Thursday, August 30, 2007

The World Will Keep On Turning

It would, wouldn't it? It doesn't matter whether I skip school, sleep, or choke myself up and die. I'm just a small part of it, a small pebble along the road that eventually gets crushed by wheels of speeding cars. I don't really matter.

So why must I go through all of these things? Why can't I just end the crap when I want to?

What? I'm continuing, struggling for the people around me. But hell, I'm already farked up and dead inside. What's the point? Every single second spent breathing, is so painful. It hurts so effing much. It's that slow kind of torture, with the will to kill, but never, ever really getting there.

Am I making sense at all?

Sometimes I wish they would just end it. Get through with it. But even if I wish for it to, it never happens. It never ends.

I skipped school, because... I DON'T want to be there. I have no desire to do anything anymore. Even typing is a drag... But my heart feels heavy, and I need to vent... And I have no other way but this.

Mish wrote at 4:20 PM